Shit, Shit, Shit SHIT!

Today I received a reference to an important, wealthy travel agent who works in corporate travel. I felt like the luckiest guy in the world to get his email. I'm aware that all good jobs come from networking. I thought to myself, "this might be it...this might be my way in."

So I prepared the perfect email, briefly introducing who I am, and what I aim to achieve. In two sentences I summed up my work history, and made a statement like, "please see my attached resume for more details."

I read that email over and over at least 40 times. I spent about 15 minutes just staring at the screen, making sure everything was spelled properly. Everything had to be perfect. I had to make the best impression possible so that this big head honcho man would know that I'm serious, and give me the time of day. Once i was confident in my 150 words, I clicked the send button. A whole two seconds later, I realized that something was off...

There was no resume attached.

I panicked. I panicked like I had never panicked before. What should I do? I would forever leave an unprofessional first impression. I was THAT guy. The guy too lazy to proofread his emails before sending them out. THAT guy doesn't get hired by anyone, let alone an important corporate travel agent. It was ruined. My life was over. I could kiss NY travel goodbye.

But no...I couldn't give up that easily...I had to at least try to salvage any lasting hope I had of receiving a reply. I QUICKLY typed up another short email stating, "Attached is my resume, Thank you." I made sure I ATTACHED my resume this time.

I was so embarrassed. I ensured that the first e-mail was perfect before I sent it. I wrote about 5 different copies, picked the best, and then proofread it about 40 times. It was so perfect. So how could I send it without a resume?

I lied down after that and sulked. It was over. I fucked up. I screwed myself. I lost. Game over. I fail. Life sucks.

Negativity was consuming my mind. I couldn't escape it. At least not at first. But the more I lay on my 5'7 blow up mattress, the more I started to forgive myself.

I tried damn hard to make sure that email was perfect. I spent longer than I ever have proofreading an email. I was not rushing, and I was not unprofessional. I simply made a mistake. There was nothing I could have done to prevent that.

I could have proofread that email 40 more times, spent another 10 minutes staring at the gmail screen, and still forget to attach the resume. It wasn't careless, it was a mistake.

No matter how perfect we try to make something...imperfections are unavoidable. We're all human aren't we? We forget, we stumble, we get lost, we're late, we trip, we make mistakes.

This one might have caused me to miss the best opportunity of my life...or maybe it just saved me from working for 40 years in an evil, stressful corporate environment. I don't know what damage or rewards this mistake will present...but I do feel comfortable knowing that there was no way around it.

Maybe he will reply anyway. I don't know. I always tell myself that I have until I'm 30 to start my career. I feel like your 20's is your time for crappy jobs, tiny apartments, pushing your limits, and making all the right mistakes. So although I may have lost the opportunity to be a travel agent at 22, I don't have to stress out about it until I'm 29.

Let's make these mistakes now people, while it's still okay.

Can you add a little New York to my life please?

Being in another major metropolis, I always find myself comparing it to other cities. New York is dirtier than Tokyo, Boston's buildings are prettier than New York's. Tokyo had so much less space to move around. Thoughts like this pop into my head every fifth ave of a second, every day. But there is one thought in particular that I keep thinking to myself. New York has a hell of a personality.

I reconnected with an old friend today, Jamie. We met at school in Boston. After feeding me the best cupcakes of my life, she took me on a walking tour of Manhattan. We chatted the usual catching up conversations, but we found ourselves doing the same thing that I do by myself - comparing New York to the rest of the world. We walked through an intersection, and Jamie would comment on how it reminded her of Boston's financial district. Then we walked through Washington Square park and I commented on how it reminded me of Boston Common. Later we reach the seaport and we talked about how it looked like Faneuil Hall.

The comments kept pouring out of us, partially because Boston was our common ground. But probably we just wanted to take a small trip down memory lane together...without actually visiting memory lane.

However I soon realized...as much as we try to compare New York to other places...we simply can't. There are similarities here and there, but New York is so unique, and so diverse, that there is no such thing as a sister city.

While we walked south, we passed an NYU dorm. Some spunky student left us a happy surprise in his or her window.




And just in case we were looking at the wrong side of the building, a friendly neighbor was offering directions.



Everywhere we went there was something to do, something to see, or something worth blogging about. We walked down to Washington Square Park and found a very talented street artist, painting with sand.

















We then walked about 15 meters and were distracted by some thesbians, putting on a show about Cesar. Then after a couple blocks we found the giant rotating cube. So we pushed. We pushed hard.

















Eventually our path led us to the waterfront. We caught a beautiful view of Brooklyn, and tried our absolute hardest to look happy by the freezing cold river.

















So what did I learn today? New York has spunk. Not Regina George, call up Planned Parenthood on Taylor Wedell spunk, but a good kind of spunk. There is sketch, and there is class...often times on the same block. But no matter where New York takes you, there will always be something beautiful, interesting, or just plain strange to look at.

New York will always have plenty of surprises up its sleeves. Surprises like running into a tambourine taping monkey in the subway, holding up a sign that says, "Your smile is beautiful."

A $15 daily commute? Uh oh...

When we have a goal, we do whatever it takes to reach that goal, don't we? We climb steep mountains, cross dangerous bridges, and make sleazy wagers with all the wrong people. Eventually though, all of our hard work and determination pays off.

But what if it pays too much...and what if we get more than what we asked for?

I'm sure most people would say, “perfect!” Getting more than what you wanted allows you to pick and choose the bits that work best for you. But what if you don't want to pick? What if you want all of what you've worked for, when in reality, you can only have a small portion?

What am I talking about exactly? Well I'm talking about life...what else do I talk about on here? More specifically though, I'm talking about careers. I tried so hard in both Boston and New York to find a good, well paying, exciting, Kyle-friendly job. I fear that I've just found two. What's worse...I fear those jobs aren't willing to share me.

I've already been hired to be a server in a very swanky, very sexy restaurant. I'm wicked excited to work there. My co-workers are wonderful, and management is ideal. When I got hired, I knew I had made it. I knew that New York was ready to welcome me with open arms. Everything felt right.

Then today, I interviewed with an airline company. Being in an airport again, and being around travelers reminded me of my long term goals. It reminded me that although I want to make a name for myself in New York, I want to make a name for myself in the travel industry. How can I call myself a world traveler if I simply stay put?

I was so happy to be in that airport, and I got along great with the interviewers. They complimented me plenty, and told me I had a very high chance of being hired. I was ecstatic.

Later that day, as I was taking the $7.50 train ride back home, I realized something. Training dates for the airline company, and training days for the restaurant opening clashed. The airline had mandatory training days before and during the restaurant's first opening weeks.

It might not be possible to keep both of those jobs.

So what would I do? Would I politely decline the airline company, possibly closing the door to NY travel? Or would I suddenly back out from the restaurant staff.

I've been weighing the pros and cons of course, but they always come out equal. One gets me more money, while the other gets me discounted travel. One puts me in a fast paced casual dining facility, while the other puts me in a fast paced international facility. One lets me work with a world famous chef while the other lets me work in a world famous airport.

I know I don't have to decide today. But I know that very soon I may. I might be stepping a little ahead of myself, figuring that the airline hasn't hired me yet, but I can't help it. I feel like I've earned both of these jobs, and now I can't have both of them.

I keep telling myself that I just need to think about it more...but when do I ever think about things before I do them? I feel like no matter how much I think about which job I want, I will end up making some hasty, off the top of my head decision when the time comes.

I guess that's not a bad thing though. If it wasn't for hasty, off the top of my head decisions, then I wouldn't be in New York right now, would I?

Arriving Early has its Perks

Life has a funny way of surprising you. Sometimes the surprises are frustrating. Like after boarding the E train you find out that the E train runs on the F line today, skipping your transfer stop. But other times life has a sneaky little way of giving you just what you need, just when you need it the most.

Training stated at 11am today. The trainer didn't show up until noon. Why? Lot's of confusion and miss-communication apparently. But that hour gave us trainees some time to talk. I was the first one to arrive, so naturally I started talking to the girl who arrived next. Both of us felt like we were walking blindly through a hallway of nail covered walls. We knew nothing about the restaurant, nothing about the menu, and the trainer was nowhere in sight. It was not the time for awkward silences. It was the time for insecure small talk.

This led us to reveal a brief history of ourselves. I mentioned that I used to live in Japan, and to my surprise, the 5'10, skinny Tyra Banks look alike said, "Oh me too!"

She called herself a military brat who used to live in Okinawa. Instantly another 10 minutes of conversation was born. I found out that she was born in Hawaii, moved to Okinawa for middle school, started her professional life in LA, and finally arrived in New York a few months ago. I asked her if she liked LA. She responded with, "absolutely...but I left."

Those words resonated on a strange chord with me. She liked it...but she left. Why would someone leave a place they like? Soon after, we started talking about Tokyo. She asked, "Did you like Tokyo?"

I responded, "I loved it...but I left..."

I realized then that leaving a place you feel comfortable isn't unusual. For some people venturing into the unknown is terrifying...but for others, it's exhilarating.

Finally, I had found someone on my wavelength.

Later in the conversation I asked her why she chose New York. Apparently there was no real reason...life just took her here. She ended with a comment like, "I guess I'll always be a military brat at heart. Traveling around, bound to no single location. I love it."

The comparisons between her and I are obvious...let's be honest. Even though I didn't know it at the time, meeting her was just what I needed. Living carefree without a plan is wonderful, but it's stressful beyond belief. It comes with loneliness, culture shock, a constant fear of failure, and so many other obstacles. On the bright side though it comes with incomparable experiences, meeting the most diverse and wonderful people in the world, seeing things none of us knew existed, and so so so much self discovery.

I have a world of respect for those content in one location. Staying put allows you to grow connections with your surroundings. It helps you maintain strong physical relationships, and gives you a comfort zone which offers safety and stability. All of those are good things, and all those things I may never have.

I guess there are two kinds of people out there. Those that like the stability, and those that crave the instability. Being a traveler isn't easy...sometimes you think you're crazy. Sometimes you think you're making all the wrong choices.

That is, until you meet that one person who reminds you that you're on the right track.

East 34th Street...or West 34th Street?

We always need to know where we're going don't we? Which train do I take, where do I take it to, which supermarket am I going to shop at, where am I going to sit to drink my soy, decaff, sugar free, vanilla hazelnut cappuccino? Everyday we make such minor choices that map out a route for ourselves without even knowing it.

Some routes that lots of us are aware of, are long term routes. Some of us write them down, and some of us keep that information in the back of our minds, bringing it to the front when times get rough. I have a vaguely drawn map for myself just like everyone else.

However sometimes, I need to remind myself that a long term path is just that - long term.

I start training tomorrow to be a server at what seems to be an exciting casual dining facility. I'm more than happy, I'm ecstatic. I searched for a month and a half in Boston for a job like this and got nothing. I searched for a week in New York and bam - employment time.

Making money is going to be great, and I know waiting tables is going to be an exciting and challenging adventure for me. But being hired as a server got me thinking about what my long term destinations used to be. I never planned this path for myself.

I never intended to move to New York and serve people overpriced Manhattan dinners. Hell I never even planned on focusing my career on travel. So what did I plan? What was I expecting?

Life throws us in directions we never thought existed. At first I thought there was only right, left, up, or down. I didn't know I could be tossed halfway between up and right with a few weeks of moving down, then a few months of moving left. And that gets me thinking even more. What's waiting for me to the far left...and how is that different from what's waiting at the far right. How do the rewards at the ends of up and down even compare?

Am I making sense? Who knows. But what I do know is that life is full of surprises. Just because we didn't plan to take a right doesn't mean we shouldn't. Just because I didn't plan to serve overpriced Manhattan dinners doesn't mean it's wrong. And just because the travel industry hasn't realized how much it needs me yet, that doesn't mean that it wont soon.

Stay safe, stay warm, stay focused.

Public Transit Stikes Again!

I'm going to try my hardest not to rant about the inconvenience of New York public transportation. I understand that no transportation system is as convenient or as efficient as the one in Tokyo. I was spoiled beyond my wildest beliefs, and now everything else will just be second par...I get it!

The truth is that the trains in NY are quite convenient...at least compared to the ones in Boston. They come almost always in intervals of five minutes, and some stations even inform people when the next trains will come. I was very pleased with this.

BUT, one thing that I will never understand is the bus system. I get that buses are commonly a type of transportation for locals. Usually people who know an area well, or live in a more suburban location will take a bus. I understand this. So I wasn't too shocked when I stepped into a bus, and there were no electronic displays informing us passengers of the stations we pass. That was fine, as long as the driver, or some mystical voice announced the stations we approach.

Nope...none of that.

The first time i took a bus it was around midnight or one AM. There were three other passengers riding beside us...so I just thought the bus driver was being lazy. I was glaring out the window to see the dimly lit street signs as best as I could to ensure I wouldn't miss my stop. Mind you I'm not from here...I barely knew what my neighborhood looked like, let alone be capable of spotting it out while driving 30 mph at midnight. And street names? Ha, yeah right.

So whatever, it was a frustrating ride caused by a lazy bus driver. It was fine, and I was over it.

Today I took another bus, and guess what happened. Again no station display...and again no station announcements. I once again focused my eyes out the window, counting up the streets. 75th, 76th, 77th. At some point I glanced back into the bus, and noticed something funny. Nobody else was looking out a window. People were acting just as they would in a Boston bus...only with no hint of what station was coming up. How did they do it? Do all New Yorkers have a photographic memory of the bus routes?

I started to feel strange. Everyone else was reading a book, listening to an ipod, or shutting their eyes for a quick rest. I on the other hand was nervously bobbing my head back and fourth, eyes focused out the window. I was once again, the tourist gaijin.

Eventually I made a guess thinking "My stop must be somewhere around here." I pulled the yellow string with apprehension...if it was the wrong stop would I be Japanese about it and get out anyway out of politeness? Or would I admit my mistake and try the next stop. How many stops would I have to delay the bus for just to ensure I got off at the right street corner? So many worries were filling up my head. Missing my stop and then retracing the bus route seemed like the only polite thing to do.

No, it was time to be assertive. It was time to be a New Yorker. I pulled the string willing to accept any and all consequences which accompany that. To my utmost surprise, i guessed right my first try.

So what did we learn? Avoid buses at all cost unless we want a stressful 15 minutes filled with judging eyes and insecurities...or unless we have an iphone with some swanky gps application.

Overall though I do admit that New York has a pretty kick ass transit system. But for now, I'm stickin' to the trains.

The King of Queens

I moved in today. There was a slightly awkward moment running into the other room mates who didn't know of my arrival. I felt a little bad telling them that I will be living with them, rather than asking them. It all worked out though. The cat didn't escape and they approved my presence with a, "yeah okay."

Tomorrow the interviews start and the job search gets serious. Waking up form my first interview at 6am is either a shocking inclination of things to come...or just one early interview. Let's hope its the latter.

I have high hopes for tomorrow. If we're being honest, arriving in New York the second time wasn't as exciting as it was last week. A part of my mind is going, "oh boy...you're pulling another Boston." I don't think that's the case though. The Boston job search failed because of limited opportunities right? New York has much more to offer...right?

I won't let what happened in Boston happen to me here too. Frankie S. once told me that if I can make it in New York I can make it anywhere. I know I can make it here. Staring from scratch is going to be rough though. I mentioned before that I wasn't exactly thrilled at the idea of making a whole new circle of friends in New York. I've done the whole leave home and start a new life thing. It was great. My life was great. I know New York will be great...but I don't know...something feels dull.

I think I'm tired out from the move...or maybe a little lonely. But I know you gotta cross the hills to reach the top of the mountain. Okay, I'm going to stop writing before my thoughts get any more pessimistic. Things will work out. Believe.

New York... A City or a Borough?

I'm sitting here in my Queens apartment, and I know I'm in a city. Heck the noise outside my window is louder than the noise I heard when living in downtown Tokyo. But that's the thing I don't get... where I live in Queens is not downtown. Queens feels more like an urban suburbia (Like that makes sense). The only area that feels like a city is Manhattan. So I'm starting to wonder if all the references to New York City are really just references to Manhattan.

Last night my room mate and I were out again. We had a fabulous evening drinking fabulous cocktails at a fabulous club. It was fabulous. Where were we? Manhattan of course. So the half hour train ride back to Queens got me thinking. Manhattan is so full of life... so much energy, so many landmarks, so much opportunity. Can places like Queens and Brooklyn really posses such allure?

Let's get this straight, I have yet to visit "downtown" Queens or "downtown" Brooklyn. I might be completely wrong on this. But my first impression leads me to believe that New York City isn't five boroughs...but rather one borough with four little siblings.

I know that Brooklyn is the artsy, hipster capital. That's fine. Queens feels like a giant mix of ethnicities. That's fine too. The Bronx I have yet to visit, and Staten Island... although I've visited confuses me too much to write about.

So that takes me back to Manhattan. Manhattan is where it all happens. All the famous movies were filmed there. All the "New York" touristy landmarks are there. All the people are there. So what does it mean if I live in Queens? I know that I'm in New York...but does it feel like New York? I can't answer that yet.

Either way I'm not complaining. I love my apartment and feel blessed for the opportunity to be here. Someday I will move to Manhattan. Someday the electricity that is Manhattan will be a part of my daily life. But for now, it's time to put a head on my shoulders. Great opportunity only comes from great amounts of hard work.

Final Destination: The Corner of 7th Ave. and 28th St.

Let me begin by introducing myself.

I'm a New Englander...born and raised in western Mass. I'm also a gaijin. What's a gaijin? Well that's Japanese for foreigner. Yes I've spent the past four years in Tokyo Japan. Tokyo was magical. It was like a dream, taking the shape of over sized plush dolls and six inch high hair styles. I loved every minute of my time there, but that chapter in my life has closed. But where do you go once you've lived in the largest and possibly most active city in the world? The other largest and most active city in the world: New York.

I arrived here only a day and a half ago, and already I'm bushed. Not every day will be so draining, that I know. But I'm always up for a challenge, mental or physical. A dear friend of mine, always tells me that I'm never happy where I am. I always need to seek out something better than what I currently have. What does that mean exactly? It can mean a lot of things. Do I think she's wrong? No...there is truth to her observation. But I also think that motivation can have roots that stem deeper than we realize.

So what motivated me to come to New York? Wanderlust perhaps...more career opportunities makes sense. I honestly don't know. I remember sitting in my ex's tiny apartment in Japan watching the show "Sex and the City." I remember thinking, "Wow, America is so crazy and full of life. I would love to move back." But I never thought New York would be the place. I have nothing here...no reason to be here. My life was in Tokyo, and Massachusetts. So when I made the big move back home this December I naturally moved my life to Boston. I had friends in Boston. I knew Boston. Boston made sense.

Boston and I got in plenty of fights, but I don't think it was all the fighting that made me want to leave. I felt like I was trying to re-live a lifestyle I had lived in the past. I felt like Tokyo had prepared me to live a fast, solar powered electric life...and Boston was offering me a quaint, small town, borrow a cup of sugar from my neighbor life. I know that Boston isn't a small city...but after Tokyo it sure feels that way. So I came down to New York to visit a friend of mine from Japan. It was love at first sight. I knew from the first day I needed to transition myself down here. Do I know anybody? With the exception of Marc, no. But I don't think that matters.

It's hard to relocate. I've done it twice...first to Boston to begin my college career, then again to Tokyo to really begin my college career. Before I came down here I had thought a lot about moving here. I kept asking myself: Do I really want to start over...again? I feel like the answer to that is no. Bust I also feel like staying in Boston isn't going to give me the life I want. It's time for a change...a BIG change...and if that means starting a brand new life then so be it.

I'm going to be blogging about New York: What I notice, what I experience...what I wished I experienced... I feel a little silly for starting another blog. I've already attempted a video and travel blog in the past. The video blog stopped when I stopped filming...the travel blog stopped when I stopped traveling...but If I can tough it out, and stay in New York, this blog has no reason to stop.

So I hope you're all here with me as I take on this city. I'm going to be updating at least once a week, if not more.

It's time to take a bite out of the biggest apple I can find.